Of the three areas of spirituality I mentioned in my last post, Our Neighbour is the one that I find most difficult to plan for. There are so many needs, both local and global, that I find myself paralysed by the enormity of the task which usually leaves me doing absolutely nothing. The list below is a work in progress. Since coming back to Swansea I have begun to tackle the first and the last practices, but am still struggling to fit the middle two into my routine. Let me know what you think.
Our Neighbour
Use ethical banks
Buy ethical clothes
Volunteer on a regular basis
Give some money away
22 comments:
Good points Jon. One thing I'm doing this year and I'm trying to get others to do is to give ethical gifts. It's only 34 days (I think) until the big day. In my family we're ordered to write christmas lists and top of mine is 20 chickens! Not for me but check out http://www.sendacowgifts.org.uk/ for some christmas gift ideas.
That's a good idea Tim. Speaking for myself I find it easier (only just) to give stuff away, buy ethically etc than I do just actually treating everyone with love.
At the moment I am really praying for patience as I think I can be a little short tempered - not helpful in my job! Me giving a tithe away is a hell of a lot easier than not getting irritated when explaining where to use a comma for the 100th time.
I guess with the neighbour thing it is a case of think globally, act locally. Cheesey but true.
the scrivs are good people to ask on this. im dead impressed with all the effort they go through to live in a way that limits the damage we cause to the enviroment, savinmg water etc
Tim, that is a great idea. I've found trying to convince people to buy me animals a bit difficult though. The most common objection is that when people buy me a gift, they want me to enjoy it. Do they have a point?
Josie, you are not alone, I have similar problems treating those around me with love. What kind of practices do you think would be useful in helping to instill that kind of attitude in our daily lives?
Justyn, the Scrivners are impressive. I hear Jon's even thinking of building a house out of pooh. However, the environment is the third area, my plan is to post about that next week.
Yeah I see you point Jon but I think it starts with us. If there is someone else in your family who is like wise inclined then be sure that your gift to them is the cow! My auntie went crazy at my mum the other day becasue my mum joked that my cousins would end up getting chickens if they didn't have some ideas for a christmas gifts. My auntie (a very well off christian) told my mum that christmas was all about family and there was no way she'd be buying gifts for people she doesn't know!!! Needless to say I won't be buying her a cow even though she has all that she could ever need but I'm going to definately buy an ethical gift for someone like my gran or mum who'll really value that. The trick is to get them something else too. It's all about small steps. This year a chicken, next year a farm!!!
I think all these ethical practices are excellent. As well as our money, I think another way of helping our neighbours is giving of our time and energy. The world is a big place, so it may be helpful to look at what is happening in your own back yard and ask yourself - how much of my time is spent on me and things that I like doing?
We can give of our time and energy in practical ways, fun ways, in meeting for chats or in prayer. Things that will hopefully encourage one another and build (here it comes...) community.
Janet gave me a stethoscope for my birthday although I can't remember where it was being sent to. I am giving one of my aunties some thing like chickens because I know she would understand and appreciate.
Charity shops are a good place for clothes, books, records. Recycling and helping a charity all in one go. (But don't tell my boss in the bookshop that I buy my books secondhand.)
Christmas cards: I've always made a point of buying cards in aid of a charity but if you do that, read the small print. Lots of cards that are sold give something like 2p from each card sold; whereas with cards that are produced by, say, Cancer Research, and sold in their shops, all profit goes to the charity.
I am basking in a little glow of self righteousness just now (whilst my husband mixes poo-mud-bricks in the bath).Though it shouldnt last for long, we are not really paragons of virtue (though, if it holds you accountable to your own humility please continue to think of us and treat us as demi-Gods).
the problem with starting an ethical lifestyle is that its a whole great big can of worms. you start by boycotting nestle, and the next thing you know, you're rescuing cats (havent got there yet).
I really dont feel like we live anywhere near the lifestyles that we should. sure, we recycle, and have an 'if its yellow let it mellow' policy, but theres so so much more that we could do but dont, often through laziness or fear. One of my biggest bugbears is that I put off doing acts of random kindness because I fear offending someone or being rejected. And as amazing as I think the whole RAOK idea is, and the few times I have done it it has made someones day, but I still fear mockery.
The giving ethicla gifts idea is a really good one, cos it helps with middle-class christmas guilt too. if your family/friends are materialistic, try people tree or traidcraft for proper presents you can hold in your hands and that dont smell of goat, but make sure your pray that they will see the error of their materialistic ways while celebrating baby Jesus' birthday.
How about giving chickens instead of Christmas cards?! I figured nobody cares about cards anyway so they will probably be quite entertained to receive a crap, black-and-white hand-printed one that says 'I bought you a chicken instead this year!'. This is what I am doing, anyway. Send a Cow is fab. Steve is likely to get lots of bits of card in his stocking saying 'One goat', and I might even wrap them up so he gets the anti-climax thing. Tim, you should do the same for your aunt, but use a really big box.
I am quite jealous, as I would like 20 chickens myself, but don't have quite the same need (and would also be worried about being pecked).
Have been thinking much lately about reducing our impact on the environment. We recycle and compost and do the organic thing (more and more by the day) but there must be more to do, and it's something I have been thinking about writing on. Jodie, maybe you and your poo-stirring hubby can give us all some direction? Non-excrement related?
Tim, your mum should have said to your aunt "don't have a cow man". That would have been hilarious.
At the risk of drawing the conversation back to what Jon actually wanted to talk about, might I humbly suggest a look at the definition of the word 'neighbour'. While our neighbour includes those around the world, it also includes the people who live next door to us.
I'm not great at this (although I was invited to a very exciting 40th birthday party of one of our neighbours), but I think that its really important to make an effort to those who live next door to us, and those who live on our road, or on our estate.
Like Victoria said about the community thing, I think a key for being good to our neighbour would be going out on a limb and introducing ourselves to our neighbours. They're actually the people that see us most often, and it would be a shame to not realise that there are actually really needy people right next door to us.
Unfortunately my mother isn't as sharp as you Tim but what a response that would have been!
What can I do when my neighbours are restaurants, take aways and hotels? I was thinking of popping some christmas cards in but they would read:
"Dear whoever owns this place or opens the mail
Happy Christmas!
Lots of Love from the guy who lives at 644 (Thats inbetween the turkish bbq and the shorleine hotel)"
With regards to the nieghbour thing, has anyone read 'How to be good' by Nick Hornby? Very funny.
Anyway, he is on a mission to be good (hence the title) and so invites all of his neighbours over and asks them all to take in a homeless person. It's funny to imagine what would happen if that was actually done. The reactions in the book are pretty accurate I'd say.
Also, someone bought me a book called 'change the world for a fiver', it has loads of tips on how to make a difference etc. There is a page in there that is divided into 5 little rip off slips. They say Hi, I'm called _____ and I'm your neighbour. Just to let you know that if you ever need anything I'd be happy to help, give me a ring on _________' or something like that. How would we feel about doing something like that?
Regarding neighbours.
On one side we have the Bible College. The only contact we have had from them was when they called the police because they thought we were invvoled with satanic practices.
On the other side, two doors dow, lives a woman who called Environmental Health to complain that we were making a mess of the road.
Three doors down lives a policeman who came to accuse Rob and friends of throwing stones on his drive.
Gee, I wonder why we don't get cards from our neighbours.
pop into the year of living generously site, www.generous.org.uk. I like the idea of just a couple of lifestyle changes/ new things to think about each month. Speaking of which... I must pick my things for November! Also it makes you smug about the things you do already. all in all a good idea!
Liz, you have some nasty neighbours, was I one of the co-accused?
I like the rest of the ideas. There is so much we could be doing.
Tim, great point about not missing those who we see everyday.
Chalky, I still haven't signed up to that site (I am a lazy ass). Hoping to get round to it soon. Keep reminding me.
I have that change the world for a fiver book, its amazing, if you want one place to start, buy it. its full of ideas not just saving the environment stuff, but how to build community and generally be a really nice person.
if you want to do something like send a cow but on a more local level there is a website called thoughtful.org which supports british charities, so you can buy christmas dinner for a homeless person, or extra help for NSPCC. plus they send you something tangible to give the person you have donated on behalf of (so if you're extra amazing you can give that away too!)
This christmas I'm on a mince pie mission. so far we've not done great on getting to know our neighbours - stoner students on one side and a lady who works long hours and has very loud sex on the other side. so I'm gonna bake mince pies and take them round. christmas is an amazing excuse to build community. get your mates and go carol singing, or give minc pies out to frazzled shoppers (but please dont hand out a tract with them - gifts without a catch are so much better). Even if next door is a business the workers might appreciate mince pies, and you get a nice warm glowing feeling by doing something nice for no reason.
On a non-christmassy but ethical tips level, buy a job-lot of vinegar, lemon juice, and bicarb of soda. these are all you need to clean a house (plus elbow grease). I've banned cleaning products from my house, partly because I dont like chemicals and partly because most cleaning products are made of lemon juice anyway but they cost 5 times as much.
one thing I have relented on is that we dont buy ecover washing up liqid anymore cos its rubbish! but the coop one is supposed to be fairly good for the environment anyway.
and I really really want some chickens!!
So she's still having very loud sex. We heard way more than we wanted too last year. Which reminds me, how is the little house doing?
still cute but SO SO cold! plus the gutters fallen off!
oh, and we only have hot water in the shower. so thats not fun
or is it?!
Hello folks. I have read this post a few times, plus the comments you have all chipped in. If this dialogue is still going then I thought I'd chip in my 2 cents worth. I have read the things you all mentioned about a global focus on our neighbour and about giving money and volunteering etc. I do similar things but have had a feeling for the last couple of years that its horribly inadequate. Its been a kind of dawning sense of dissatisfaction with anything I've tried to do in reaching out to people around me in my local community and on a global scale. When I was living in Barcelona for example, I moved into an area of town where there were a lot of drug addicts and prostitutes, many of whom had been tricked into coming to the city and then literally enslaved and forced to sell their bodies. I went to a church there that was trying all it could to reach out to a really broken community, and did what i could too. Here in Birmingham I've tried a bunch of ways to get involved in the lives of really obviously needy people too. What I keep finding is that I am just a bit inadequate. I reach out to these people in an attempt to follow Jesus, but then I find myself in situations that require greater wisdom or insight, or compassion, than I have in myself. Then I read the gospels and see Jesus bringing an incredible wealth of wisdom, compassion and prophetic insight to needy people, not just arriving on the scene and saying Hello. So I've been thinking that I actually need to grow in Christlikeness, not just do things. What people need is not just a friendly face in the midst of their distress, but something deeper. That makes me think twice about only giving money and volunteering etc. I mean, I look around at people who have everything they could ever need materially and mostly they seem hopelessly unfulfilled. Everybody knows that money isn't everything, because people aren't just a bundle of immediate physical needs, but how do we do anything about that? Well I think looking at it all through a "fullness of life" lens, like Jesus did, might help. If we won't settle for being unfulfilled ourselves, then maybe a lot of other people are feeling that way too. And maybe a lot of them have harrowing needs that we can easily see, but I think it would be wrong to assume that meeting all their needs in that sense is the bottom line. Give a child in extreme poverty a home, an adoptive family, a lot of money, possessions, an education and he might set himself up in a comfortable life and get a good job and have a family. But he still might drink himself to death like George Best, or be the loneliest adult in England or never know who he is or why he is alive. If we don't think about those kind of needs, then I think our help towards our neighbour will always be limited and ultimately unfulfilling to them
I am with you all the way Joel.
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